Sunday, June 23, 2019

Why is "One Day at a Time" So Hard?

Hey Friend,

I thought I was doing pretty well.  After all, my beagle and I endured the "demolition" phase of our water leak.  I held his shaking body close to me as we listened to the circular saw chew through our hardwood floors.  Then there was the ripping and tearing out of three fourths of our kitchen.  A major bank of lower cabinets and counter tops was pried away from a kitchen wall.

Then came the industrial fans and huge drying machines in our kitchen and dining area.  Even more were below the house in the crawl space.  Imagine living on the tarmac at the airport for two weeks.  The deafening roar went on 24/7.  I couldn't hear myself think.

Now is the calm before the next phase in which we will have to be out of the house for twelve days as they begin the repair process.  It will be "cozy" in our little efficiency...especially with a beagle who plaintively howls if left alone in a strange place.  Where I go, he will have to go.  Maybe I could claim him as my therapy dog??

I kept telling myself this would be an "adventure," but I don't think my body was believing my mind.  My lower eyelid developed a nervous twitch.  No big deal, I thought, just my anxiety disorder showing its head.  I ignored my body until my back joined in the "dance of spasms" and had me laid flat out on muscle relaxers and pain meds for two days.  "Get a grip, Bev," I chided myself.

Why is taking "one day at a time" so gosh-darned hard??  Perhaps if this was one isolated incident, I would be sailing through this, but it came on the heels of several other incidents wherein I felt "sidelined" from normal life.  At this point, I'd just had it!

In my praying and pondering, I realize I have come up against a sneaky adversary - the need or desire to want to be "in control".  I have no idea how the upcoming weeks are going to go.  I can control my attitude, but events?  That's a giant question mark.  I know that I don't like question marks, because it means that I have to loosen my death grip on my futile attempts to remain in control.  Is that pride I hear talking? I thought I'd won this battle already?

Usually I'm not one to look back, but in this case, I needed to look back to all the things I've come through...experiences that I was afraid of, and realize that God was right there with me through it all.  His righteous right hand always had a firm grip on me even when I felt like I was sinking.  

God never left nor has He ever forsaken me in my troubles.  He gave me grace and peace that can only come at the point when we are in the "blue flame" of the crucible.  Grace doesn't come even a moment before we actually need it in order to simply get us through. 

In scripture, God promises to be a lamp unto our feet and a light unto our path.

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. (Psalm 119:105)
He doesn't promise He'll shine His high beams into the dark forest to illuminate all the turns and obstacles up ahead.  No, He promises, only, to light the path of our feet as we take one step at a day at a time. 

So, the question is, do I trust Him?  As I look back upon all the "Ebenezers" I have raised to His faithfulness in the past and I have to ask myself, straight up, do I trust Him to bring me through this process?  Do I trust that if trying moments come, that He will show up in my time of need with His peace and grace?  He's done it many times before, so won't He do it again?

Oh how the enemy wants me to believe otherwise.  He wants me to be fearful, but fear is just a liar running out of breath.  Fear is of the enemy, not of the Lord.  I realize I need to take these thoughts captive.  I need to gather all these negative thoughts up in a giant sack and plant it firmly before the Lord...and leave it there.

Click HERE to listen to "Not Today" by Hillsong United...

We tear down arguments, and every presumption set up against the knowledge of God; and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.  (2 Corinthians 10:5)

Yes, I'm writing this post to myself, to remind myself of the Truth that I know and that I can cling to.  "Greater is He who is in me, than he who is in the world..."  (1 John 4:4)

I've just let you read along in my "self talk" in case you ever find yourself in a situation where you just don't want to hear, "Take it one day at a time." It sounds trite.  It sounds cliche, but it also sounds scriptural.  The best news is that God doesn't ask us to do it in our strength alone, He promises His enabling strength to see us through.  We are never, ever, left alone.

The Lord will fight for you(me), you need only to be still. (Exodus 14:14)

I have a feeling that I will be reading and re-reading these words God has given me as the days and hours tick away.  May we both be reminded that He is the same almighty God, yesterday, today, and tomorrow.  Faith as small as a mustard seed can topple mountains of uncertainty.  

I've faced much, much higher mountains than this, so here we go.  Hand in hand.  One step at a day at a time.  Our God is able.  

Dear Heavenly Father, I praise you and thank you for all the trials you have brought me through.  This may seem small in comparison, but the enemy is prowling about.  I claim the promise that at the precious name of "Jesus" the enemy must flee.  Thank you for the grace, peace, and strength that you give me in my hour of need.  Thank you for being the lamp that lights my feet, one step at a time.  Be with me as I go forward, holding onto your righteous right hand.  Comfort me with your whisper of, "Be still."  In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

What about you?  Are you facing something that has you anxiously looking into the future?  Do you struggle with taking things "one step at a time"?  What might God be speaking to you, here, today?  Do you trust Him?  Will you share?

Be blessed....

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